That line is staring back at me

Did i mention about the line on my finger?

So, i checked up on it like months ago when i first realise about it's existence. It means that someone is wrong with my body.

There's a 5 percent chance(I don't know?) that it meant skin cancer.



Death doesn't fear me at all. I am fear of leaving my closest people behind.

No point telling me not to look at that line anymore, because its not going to help at all.

Check-up time ):

This just add on to not worth it part.

Don't waste your time, really...




Sunrise, Sunset, Sunrise, Sunset.

Let the wind carry me.


Far away.

Away from this mess.

Away from everything that i hated.

Take care.

I am just sitting here...

Really disliked it. Anyway just when i was about to sleep my dad asked me if i jay walk a lot. I said ha>? Why the sudden interest, what's the problem.

He mentioned about the student who got into a car accident just yesterday i suppose. You know how i hope for that bloody driver to get bang up into some shithole. Really, going to jail might not even be enough.

Totally just made me remember about the car accident my dad and me went into just at the start of the year. Freaking taxi driver came down and said sorry sorry, the passenger was rushing me.

The first time i said vulgarities in front of my dad was this year anyway. I spammed that driver with everything i could recall. Just hate those drivers.

To think i wasn't even taking this incident seriously when nyjc's principal was telling us about it. I didn't knew that it was that serious.

Think about it if you were that boy's parents. My dad said that the boy wasn't at fault since the green man was not even flashing. However he said it seems like ggfied to him... The car didn't stop directly after the impact.

Btw, it's a freaking suv. I can't find the article online but i can only understand how serious is it, since my dad have been driving for like 30 years? He even got the award for perfect record of 0 accidents. So when he told me it look like ggfied, i think...

Have you ever wonder if human beings think too highly of themselves? I believe someone is laughing at us.

I hope he get up well.

Impossible was never there. It was made to let you know I'm possible.

Just a matter of how you look at it.

...

....

.....

Everytime

Feeling slightly exhausted. Humid weather ha>?

Anyway, saw nyjc tennis girls team up against ijc when i was on my way home. Sometimes things doesn't have to be said out. I know that zhaozhi's doubles would make it through.

Years of practice put to use within like less than 1 hour. Haha, i know how it feels anyway. When you are inside the game, nothing else matters except the game. Anyway, it have never been about winning the other team. It's about winning yourself, your own team.

So yeah, good luck to them.

Today we watched a show during assembly. Finally some show that prove that having clique is bullshitto.

Anyway, it's time. I felt it.



Thank you.

Dragging my feet home shall become history. Things might be changing, adaptation is the key.

However deep down inside i know that i am still me myself.

Haha, if i am not me myself, who can it be?

Like the shadow, i assure you it will be like the shadow. With light it became prominent. However, how many a times do people actually take a look at their own shadow?

Doesn't really matter haha. Can't say i will be around, but i will be. Just smile.



Bye. Take care.

What if

I'm just going to ask one question~

Anyway, 8km from now on is haha. Feel like extending my routine running to 8km from now onwards.

NS seems to hate me a lot or something. For no reason lock me out and now i have to visit the Community centre tomorrow to get my singpass.

Cool, i called up the assistance number and i spoke to the clerk there. My dream job in army haha(8-5 air-con), to deal with pesky little creature like myself.


Tomorrow's time-table look damn bad to me. I hate week B a lot.

With no power comes no responsibility.

Bullshitto.

Only the strongest will survive. Have always been so and will remain to be so and shall forever be so.

Man-kind just got lucky that evolution did good to us.

Peace out.

Let me soar through the sky, but please i do need someone to remind me of where i truely belong.

What if what if.

Crazy

Cause everybody's going crazy~~~

Give me the feel, come on i need it. I need to feel it before i will start changing gear.

Sometimes i don't really feel like typing much.

This is one of those moment...

Ok, i will give every single one of you a pat.

It's time for a kit-kat anyway.

Tsk, results stink like shit le still want to have a kit-kat. Haha, you know why?

Because everybody's going crazy~~~~




Oh ya, all the best to the floorball team for their next match. I am sure Elohim will lead the team to victory.

Because it is time, or is it not?

Haha, i own someone a milo now... Don't worry i won't pay back with milo.

There's a need for someone like that because

the situation required such a person.

I guess it's time for move on. At least there's head and a tail, rather than just in the middle.

Didn't even realise the chaos i have caused to some people until i have to hear from other people. I really want to continue on but i know that if i were to do that it would become a bigger mistake. The worst thing would be to have no ending.

It cannot be in the middle because i am scare that i will just think on the wrong side again.

I just felt like stop beating about the stupid bush and let it out.

Alright, for this once can i just use vulgarities?

Fuck my life.

Leave me alone and don't ask about it.

):

Just sit back and enjoy what karma is returning to me, i hate it. I almost cried because it's like fooling about with me. Running up the hill doesn't seem to do the job as well, perhaps my stamina improved.

That feeling sucks when i can't get it off. This place isn't even the right place to vent it out.

Byebye.

amraK

And i can't do anything about it but accept it. I know i can change it instant if i really want to, i have choices out there seriously. Too bad, it's too deep and i have to live with it.

Karma Karma Karma, for the things i did...

So yeah, being labelled is bad. Leave me alone, let me stay one corner.




Trying is already hard enough. I don't remember it being that hard in the past.

Against someone whom i don't even know is who - worst.

Am i really that hard to communicate with? Facepalm.

All these doesn't really matter. Tho if i were to say that it's not distracting me i got to be once again delusioning.

I need that calming sea in front of me now.

Perhaps perhaps perhaps.

Pass me a kit-kat.

Four numbers

Arghh, frail and weak. I am seriously going to aim for 70kg. With 60 i can never get the build at all. Weak middle section. Like seriously made a wrong decision from the start.

Haiyo whatever, i should not be taking care of that now. Slack slack slack around too much.

Ok, i am going off to do something useful.

Yeah, i am going to take in lesser oxygen from mother earth. That slows down global warming.

Tsk, should get my butt moving... I miss those days where training ends like 10 and the group of us staying there waiting to take cab home.

Mshs still rocks.

Yoga time.

If it have to come, bring it on faster. Don't waste time, avoidance was never my way.

BRING IT ON. Plus better pray that it's a good one. Something that can crush it flat. If it doesn't go down flat. (:

Kiss goodbye.

Hippy hippy cow

Tsk, i seriously wasted today. I am going to waste tomorrow also because it is leon's birthday celebration.

The usual gang is going sicc for tennis... Chayadi mentioned sicc and i told him BOWLING? Then he said nah tennis. So i was like zzz, celebration and you want us to be sweating and smell like some piggy.

Oh well, i know tomorrow will turn out fine.

Did i mention about how this is the first time i felt that my hair is too long?

Frigging heck, i want to have thicker, less holes, more define spiky top.

That can wait, so who said looks didn't matter. Bunch of bullshit, looks do matter. Let me finish it first?

TO ME LOOKS DOESN'T FREAKING MATTER WHEN I LOOK AT OTHER PEOPLE. You freaking think that you will receive better treatment if you have better looks? Kiss goodbye man, cause you are never going to get it here.

Haha, but being superficial about yourself... That's alright really.

Peace out time. Cheers~

May the force be with you.

And with you.

(: (: (:

I don't know but after jerrold said that i was a complete idoit doing that, i thought about it again.

It didn't have to be going in that direction because it's super painful. He said something but i can't really remember the phrase so... At first i thought that by doing so it will get better, who knew it got worst.

I felt as if i die a little on the inside. Not only due to the mental torment i had to endure but also because i wasn't being myself. Since when i started to draw myself to talk to certain people only. I hate it absolutely, it's like bullshitto. It's like changing my very own personality. It's like as if i have no more friends.

(:(:(: Seriously, smiling for nothing when i text you. Haha, thanks for telling me that as well. Yeah, by like 3 people i think. I knew it, i was right about it, it's going to stay there for really really long. I don't care if it's going to be like the old case.



So yesterday was pw results release. Karma catching up with me like how i explain in earlier post.

Yup, carnivore is black-listed in my eating outlet. Freaking paid 8 bucks for a can of drink imported from japan. Hello~~~??! That's alright since andrew and me doesn't really care about the price of good food. You pay 44 bucks and you can't freaking get bread and pineapple. Haha, yup carnivore serve a buffet of meat. Talking about that make me feel sick at this very moment itself. Like so much ''turkey''.

Yuck, long lengthy post which stinks.

Cheers! (:

When you told yourself that you couldn't do it. You have already lost.

When you told yourself that you could do it. You have already lost.

You know it.

I am coming back, it's time. In a slightly different manner. I am coming back stronger than before. Confidence hmmm. This reminded me about someone's final advice to me. Days where i could find a girl whom i can talk to that easily... Cherish is all i can say i guess.

Muahhahaha.

Zzzz, i need someone to knock me conscious.

7 8 9

Why is nine scare of seven?

Sometimes i feel like just stopping it. Especially when you break the silence. I don't know about it.

Hey it's not like i don't know that your advice are good. It's just that i get a weird feeling when i do it.

It's actually pressurizing. Like imagine being locked up in a vacuum room where there's no other voices but then your mind is getting all the thoughts?

I don't even know how to freaking explain it.

A constant breakdown? Waaadup, seriously seriously seriously. seriously seriously seriously seriously seriously seriously seriously.

Don't know what else to post.

Let me hold it for as long as i can. I know i will be able to do it. I know.....

Haiiiii.

In the closet

Great song.

There's still many more out there which i have not realise about yet i suppose.

Tell you what, shhhh.

(:

Kekeke what's with the heat!

Don't try saying that you're too hot!

Uhh yea, so today was qing ming. Haha, not like i have the effort to type out the whole qing ming poem for you.

清明时节雨纷纷，
路上行人欲断魂。
借问酒家何处有？
牧童遥指杏花村。

Lmao, ok the effort to copy paste that should meant something for my grandparents.

PS: I spend one whole morning at the temple doing all the rituals/ praying stuffs. The weather was certainly, BAD. I think my sunburnt located at my neck is not going off anytime soon. ):

I was actually getting irritated by the fact that every single year only my sister and me turn up there with the elders. What's the point of having relatives at all. They don't turn up for such stuff, only when they need some help do they actually help.

I was seriously going to just tell my uncles about my opinion. Oh so benjamin entered njc and he's busy mugging to the extent where he cannot spend a single morning slacking?

Hey, gugu what about your daughters? 5 of them all graduated and none of them have any time?

Hey, where are some of the elders? Oh great here i am giving offerings to 2 person i have never had interaction with, while other people are most probably laughing at our effort under the hot sun.

Actually i just felt like telling them, hey have you people studied science before?

Don't tell me science and god doesn't go together.

Lmao, i can't freaking believe i actually fell into that. Looking back, i realise that it was just.... haha.

Time to get off here like now.

(: (: (: (: (:

It's not that i didn't notice your existence. It's just that there are so many cases. Probably won't know about me knowing as well. Perhaps just for that one communication you know what i am talking about.

It's just how you see it since some detest it, some agree with it. Sadly know as corrupted. Too bad i am already inside it.

Cheers~

kst

I know i will regret it.

At least it's definitely still there.

Just there.


















): Doing things background is not to any use at all. Some people get recognized so easily because people tend to see things on surface level.

Thanks for telling me the greatest people are the crazy ones.
Go on, tell me i have an issue with dealing with such things. Go on, go on, go on, maybe that's not even enough. I want you to hit me hard, sometimes a system blackout will make things better. Because the mechanics just cut off some of the things that are causing it to be unable to load. When it wakes up, it's like never there before.

Y W N M M L B A. I Swear. I will not break it. Hey, tell that to my brain for what? He's not even responsible for it.


Side note: Don't do that, it's so obvious what are you people trying to do. It's just weird to me and i will never ever allow it to happen. At least if you want to, come alone. It's ok.

Y W N M M L B A. Y W N M M L B A. Y W N M M L B A.

White is the best word.

Just stay away and i will be ok.

ONE.

Pay a price if you want to know about it

It's so p......

It's just so p......

): /: ): ?! (:

So yeah. Today was not really bad. Considering that by the end of the day, his words still pushed me on even though it felt like i let him down...

He said you know i have faith and trust in you.

Really nothing much i can tell him except actions speak longer and he gave me a pat and send me off calling aloysious in LOL.

Talking about that is just erm... When people get into troubles they tend to make friends easily. So yeah i guess my guts was right about it, i knew that one day we will talk to each other. Just the vibe i guess.

Haha, ps i forgot to say good luck to him before he went on in. Well, at least i know that he won't need my luck. (:

You know i don't like doing things that are taxing.

That horoscope thingy on elo's phone seems to be right, though i think it will not last one month but all the way. Cause at least it is not taxing.

): PLess

Today in ct, perhaps the best ct lesson that have some interesting content. A story about Mr ong teng cheong's story with his wife. Go read about it.

Till death do them apart. Sounds like some chinese-fairytale came true...

Possible?

Little things that gives you away

Let me hear you say heyheyhey.

Heyheyhey.

Now let me hear you say heyheyho

Heyheyho!

So next time don't talk to me on msn with what's up. Cause i will just reply with nothing i am going downstairs.

Yeah, the weather is still gloomy. Doesn't help much since i have already woken up. Today's schedule was kindda already plan but i think i am not going as well. Sunburnt on the back of my neck looking pretty bad, as black as david i suppose. Even worst, maybe darker...

Whatever, no one will even comment on it so it's fine. Just that it is like itchy and irritates me. Like telling me lawrence come and scratch me so you will have scars there hehehe.

Yeah, i didn't scratch it but just hit on it hard saying so who's the winner now. No scars plus i stop the itchiness.

Ps for the bullshitto up there haha, but oh well i might just apologise here for not turning up. See the thing is i am just feeling bad for not turning up to such things. Because eventually they will just have the impression that eh, no point calling him la, he will not turn up anyway.

Alright alright, next time i plan ok? (Bad idea anyway since it will be screwed up even before it started)

So yeah, that's about all for now?


Take care, have fun, cheers.

Hmm, why not 7-11 tho...

Take care, have fun, 7-11. (:

Lalalalalalalalalala

A Lalalalalalalalalalaa.

So uhh yea, it have been raining whole day long. Not that i don't like it but imagine that happening when i am at the temple with my parents haha. So yeah, walked about there after visiting the temple and then to imm.

Nothing much happen really except i enjoyed my meals. Delicious yumyum.

Value dropping like rapidly. Figured out that it was anything but what i imagined it to be.

Hope i can change it.

Till then cheeeerrrs. After much talking with elohim we have both decided to spend less time on msn, or rather none if not needed at all.

Because real life pwn the virtual bullshit world. So yeah, i want to do things in the real world.

Cause the cool people doesn't have a blog or facebook.

However this is not a blog, it serve as a diary. Something for me to check back upon.

Teehee~

It's round, bright, distant, semi.

You can only see it but not touch it. However it's not entirely impossible to touch it.

Hate it, hate it, hate it. It's time really.

Let's go.

If i am & now, he's telling me to change to ! because ! is the way to go. & might just make me feel better but i have seen enough, that's it i am going to !.

Who cares if the good guys lose anyway. You? Oh wait, there's no frigging system to even judge who is where. Like how the human brain made up the 4d-time when it didn't existed at all.

Well, this just reminded me about what i was talking to leon on msn.

Nothing is ever fair in this world.

Keep holding on

Hmmm it's good friday and i enjoy staying at home. Have been going out almost every single day the past 2 weeks. Yes, during weekdays. To the extent whereby my dad tease me about the time i reached home.

Hello, wo hui lai le! ---ME

Waa, jing tian na me zao?----Dad

Haha, i look at the time and said 11 o'clock is early to him? Woah, finally i am having more freedom. Ya right as if, that's because i reached home on 12 for a couple of occasion haha. So 11 comparatively is ''early''. Oh well, just for that once i didn't play words with him haha.

Talking about freedom. I have never been the guy who like to be restricted by rules. My parents know about it and they let me do things my way. To be honest i never believe in the system where your parents have to lock you up, brainwash you or use desperate measures to make you study or do things they want you to do.

Hehe, tell you what's up till now they still don't know about my chinese grade. Uhh, yeah i don't like them asking about it either. Haha, but oh well my mum asked about it.

I just told her not bad la. See the thing is i like doing things myself. Because i don't like other people to fish for me, i want to fish for myself.

Not to mention leeching their money as my pocket money. 100 dollar a week. That's 400 a month so i think i will have to earn like hell a lot of big bucks$$$$$ to pay them back haha. That's fine with me since i love them a lot.

We do not need more people who do things other people tell them to, but rather we need more who think about the next few steps themselves.

(:

Let's go and do it.

Oh yeah, stop these bullshit because it's time.

Alright, after today i think i will just bann myself from watching movies for a pretty long time. Alright, see the noob himself will kill me if i were to tell him that i watched clash of the noob today.

Totally just don't want to talk anymore about the movie industry anymore. It seems like everyone think that they can be a director. Oh well, sing song talk cock with eugene and elohim after zhiquan went home.

Haha, eugene joker la made me laughed like siao. I think i just found someone who can actually make me laugh at his actions. Haha, because i always laugh at my own actions or more like other people laugh at me haha.

The king of joker is still elohim. Haha, so april's fool is today and we decided to joke about with the class. Aiya, so much fun when we lame around haha. Lame club 3 HAHA.

I quote this from his hidden blog.

"I am not a full time student. Cos im actually also a part time super hero." from Elo to Mrs Teo(Lit teacher) when she commented that he is not being a full time student.

Oh, it resulted to him being dao in the end hahahaha.

It's hammer time, this time i want to be that person.

Cheers!

One strike (: